a fren of mine ask me to go and see her frenster comment, of which was commented by someone who actually hurted me quite a lot.....
the comment was like this - "whatever is past & apolgize what i did the mistake ya!! All the best"...................
the moment i saw this mesg, my heart struck with immediate pain... Had he realise the pain he had caused me too? had he knew how i have felt? Had he is apologetic to me the same way he is to her?
I can't deny, but i find myself missing him sometimes, regardless of how he have had treat me previous time. Y? I duno why i'd be missing him....
everytime i missed him, i would always try to stop myself from thinking of him, and keep reminding myself how bad he have treated me...and how hard and how harsh he have been.
it's not fair, and it will not be fair.....i dun think it's fair to me.... but this is fate...i have to accept the fate that yes, you have come into my life, and you have left a very great mark and have even left a very deep scar in my life....
because of you, i believed in love at first sight, cus because of this, i have loved you....
but because of you, i have lost faith and no longer believe in love at 1st sight already....... there is no such thing as love at the 1st sight......
 
because of you, i believed that long distance relationship might and can work............
but because of you, i no longer dare to commit in long distance relationship anymore............

because of you, I dare to trust.....i have put all my trust to you......
but because of you, now i have not dare to even trust myself, dun need to say trust to other guys.................

because of you, i find love....as i realise, i have never wanted somebody to be in my life, i have never wanted to be with somebody as much as I want to be with you..............
but, because of you, i find love slowly moving away from me.... i lost love because of you...........as I have lost you...........

I have to say that I hate you, but like ppl say, y can there be hate when there is so much love? I hate you.......................

Everytime that i have heard the song "Hate that I love you" from Rihanna and Neyo.....it really reminds me of you....
I remember that I have sent you a mesg, dedicating this song to you, but you never actually go and understand the whole song, and you got angry........
actually, the meaning of this song is that - that's how much i love you, that's how much I need you..... I hate how much i love you, and i hate how much i need you, but i can't let you go............and i hate that i love you so..........

but fate determines all....fate really determines all, it is fate meets us up, and it is fate that ends us up.............and i accept fate...
but i still hate you so much.....................................